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Personal Development

The One Thing I Wanted Badly in my Life (and How I Got it by Failing)

I always wanted to master ONE skill in my life:

Controlling my emotions.

Hacking anxiety, frustration, guilt, and anger.

Because I found those emotions unbearable.

I hated them.

Who wants to be around someone who feels all those emotions?

I was determined to prove to everyone that I could choose what to feel and what not to feel.

I tried everything: meditation, yoga, mindfulness, spirituality, nutrition, breathing, affirmations, hypnosis.

I read hundreds of books, spent thousands on courses and gurus.

I was learning a lot, becoming wiser and … falling flat on my face in the end.

And there you go: more frustration, more anxiety, more emotional instability.

The more I was striving to control my emotions, the more they controlled me.

Until one day, I gave up.

And I allowed myself to feel anything when I was alone or in front of others.

At an interview, in a meeting room, on a stage, on a date…

Mastery is not being able to switch on and off emotions.

Mastery is being comfortable with feeling anything!

Mastery is not caring about how others perceive you—either anxious or not anxious.

However, if the way they react to you makes you feel uncomfortable occasionally, that’s still OK.

You are open to that possibility. That’s mastery.

Loving you, Angelos

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