Why is the pain still there?
Why does it get worse in the morning?
Why does it move?
Why? Why? Why?
I don’t know why.
Pain was always a mystery to me.
I noticed something though.
When I stopped asking “why” and went on to live my life, pain eased.
No longer was it always there.
Or was it? Did I not notice it?
I don’t know.
I noticed though that when I stopped checking in with my pain, it slowly went away.
When I gave up on my pain, pain gave up on me.
One day I had a moment of enlightenment.
I said, “F*** it”.
“I’m going to swim today and watch the rocks and the fish and the sun rays cut through the water”.
And, for a moment, I forgot about the pain.
My pain and I disconnected for a moment.
But the pain returned and intensified.
The following day, I thought, “F*** it, I’m going to swim again and watch the rocks and the fish and the sun rays cut through the water”.
And, for a moment, I forgot about the pain.
But, sadly, the pain returned.
Until one day, I could only see the rocks, the fish and the sun rays cut through the water.
The pain was not there.
All I could see was sun rays cut through the water.
With love, Angelos
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