There is NOTHING wrong with anger.
Repressed anger is what keeps you in pain.
The fear of others picking up on the heat that you have inside.
The fear of others thinking that you can’t control your emotions.
The fear of others calling you unprofessional.
You’ve been trained to hide your anger:
- Breath.
- Meditate .
- Go for a walk.
- Lock yourself in a conference room.
This is the stuff you usually read in a Forbes article.
I’m not encouraging you to turn desks upside down at work.
However, all these “anger management” techniques make you even more afraid and ashamed of your anger—a feeling that is natural to feel.
When you run away from something, you miss the opportunity to learn from it.
What should you do?
- Acknowledge your anger. Say, “I’m angry right now”.This will elevate your level of consciousness.
- Don’t do anything to “manage” your anger. This sends the subliminal message to your unconscious mind that you’re afraid or ashamed of anger.
- Don’t use your intellect or logical arguments why you shouldn’t be feeling angry. You make things worse. Your survival brain simply ignores or fights back all your logical arguments.
- Let me repeat it: It’s OK to feel angry.
- Once you’re more grounded look for the wisdom behind your anger. Is it a belief that aroused your anger? Something you care about a lot? Something you’re afraid of?
Anger offers unique opportunities to grow and become more self-aware.
Please don’t listen to those who teach you to behave like a Buddist monk when you’re angry.
That leads to more repression and … yes, more physical pain.
—Angelos
PS: Learn more about how repressed anger causes physical pain. Read this.